What are Limiting Beliefs?

Recall a time that you made a mistake, got negative feedback, or felt embarrassed or insecure. We’ve all had these moments. What were the first thoughts that popped into your head at that time? Often, our reflexive thought is quite negative and our programming convinces us that: “no one likes me”, “I’m not good enough”, “I’m too much”, or “I’m unloveable”. These are all examples of limiting beliefs, usually painful and negative core beliefs about ourselves, that are generally subconscious and dictate how we interact with others and ourselves. 

These negative beliefs usually show up as automatic thoughts and appear almost without our awareness or conscious thinking. They are so automatic because they are hardwired in our brains and usually learned at a very young age. Beginning in childhood (and sometimes infancy), our bodies take in information from the outside world and then store this internal knowledge about ourselves, our safety, and the world to validate or strengthen the limiting belief. Unfortunately, if our core beliefs are negative, we have a large storage file with all of the examples or “reasons” we are not good enough, unworthy, or unloveable. Our bodies tend to hold onto these beliefs that are formed at a very young age and in a specific environment and carry them forward into our interactions. This can look like hunching our shoulders in a new situation, feeling like we’re wearing a mask or fake smile in social situations, or having a pit in our stomach when attention is focused on us. 

Understandably, the impact of limiting beliefs can be significant. They can keep us feeling stuck in our jobs or relationships; feeling like we have to keep working harder to prove ourselves; feeling like an “imposter” who everyone will eventually figure out; or bracing for eventual rejection or abandonment. Thankfully, we also have the power to correct, shift, and reprogram these beliefs. Through EMDR and sensorimotor psychotherapy, we can rewire and install new, more accurate, and truthful beliefs that help us to feel a deep sense of worthiness, confidence, and lovability. If you are struggling with the impact of limiting beliefs, please contact me for a free consultation and take the first step toward self-acceptance and self-love. 

What Does Intuitive Counseling Mean?

How can intuitive counseling help? 

Everyone has intuition which can be defined as inner knowing, a sense of wisdom, or a deep connection to your highest self. This inner knowing allows us to make decisions that resonate with what we really want, to set boundaries that support our health, and help us to feel connected to ourselves AND others simultaneously. Intuition can also help us to access our creativity and to get into a flowing and open mindset at work. However, this sense of inner attunement can sometimes be polluted by strong opinions or criticism from others, stress and anxiety, self-doubt, or due to traumas or periods of time in which we have to have a strong outward focus to stay safe. 

I decided to name my practice Intuitive Wellness because I have found that the body is a key source of connection to both intuition and wellness. I have personally experienced moments when I felt something was “off” and checked in with myself instead of checking out into distraction, preoccupation, or overthinking. By tuning in, I have noticed that time and again I can find the answer to a problem, identify what I might need to do to care for myself if there is no solution right now, or recognize if I need to set a boundary or take a step toward or away from something. This ability to check in with ourselves and our body and to pay attention to the internal signals we are inundated with has allowed me to honor and care for myself as well as extend compassion and patience to others. 

It is not unusual for us to spend most of our time in our heads - daydreaming, spinning on a problem we can’t seem to fix, preparing for something that hasn’t yet happened, or focusing on our surroundings and the needs of others - which ultimately distances us from the tools and inner wisdom we have to solve whatever is bothering us. It can seem intimidating to leave the comfort and familiarity of our intellect, yet when we connect to the body, slow down, and tune in, we often find the inner wisdom we are seeking when we are “going down the rabbit hole” of anxiety. If you feel overstimulated, anxious, preoccupied, forgetful, or overwhelmed, you might benefit from gaining some tools that help you to quiet the mind and tune in to your intuition. If you are looking to feel more connected to yourself, less consumed by others, or to have a deeper connection to your body and its internal signals, your inner wisdom may already have led you to this page and I am here to help! Click here to get started, learn more, or contact me.  

With gratitude, 

Kim 

How Does Body-Based (Somatic) Counseling Work?

How Does Sensorimotor Psychotherapy help to heal trauma?

Many are drawn to increasing their “mind-body connection” but it can be confusing to determine what that means. While activities such as yoga, meditation, exercise, physical activity, and sports all consist of a brain-body connection, sensorimotor psychotherapy (SP) is unique in that it uses mindfulness and body awareness to regulate the nervous system and process traumatic or upsetting events that can keep us feeling “stuck.”

In a sense, our brain is actually housed throughout the body through the network of neurons that connect our brain with our spinal cord and the rest of our body. To understand the mechanics of sensorimotor psychotherapy it is important to know about the nervous system. The nervous system can be likened to a program or software that runs on a computer. If our body is the computer, our nervous system is the software that runs programs and sifts through information coming in. Our brain is part of the nervous system and it uses billions of neurons that run throughout the body which communicate with the environment and relay information back. Our nervous system deciphers the data that everyone is constantly inundated with - signals such as temperature, information coming into our five senses like light and sounds, the rate of our breathing and heartbeat - and uses that data to cool our body off, blink our eyes, increase our circulation, or react to keep us safe from harm. In a regulated and healthy nervous system, these processes run smoothly; however due to constant stress, interrupted sleep or health problems, or traumatic and disruptive experiences, the “program” of the nervous system begins to become either over- or under-reactive. This might look like feelings of panic, sweating, racing thoughts, rapid heart rate and breathing, a sense of impending doom, hives, restless sleep (all examples of over-reactive) or fatigue, low mood, hopelessness, reduced motivation, apathy, feelings of unreality, or disconnection (all of these are under-reactive).

SP comes in because, unlike traditional “talk” therapies, increasing awareness of the body allows us to attune to the signals of the nervous system to create present-moment awareness that reduces over- or under-reactivity. In the same way that a virus on a computer might change how a program works, stress on the nervous system can cause these programs to run at too fast or too slow of a pace. SP can be a reset button that helps us to pay attention to natural processes occuring in our body and use mindfulness to bring these responses into awareness.

Once we have awareness of a pattern, such as frequent racing heart, fidgeting, or restlessness, we can explore ways to resource and shift these ingrained patterns. Our nervous system can sometimes create a feedback loop because feeling anxious or worried sends signals that we might be in danger which compounds stress and tells our body to be even more “on guard.” Luckily, our brains also have higher-order skills that allow us to create new patterns, often with the help of therapy.

The next step is to process material that might be stuck in our nervous system and creating repetitive patterns of over- or under-reactivity. This can look like using body awareness to complete responses that are “stuck” in the nervous system and contributing to feeling anxiety, panic, or fatigue. For example, the freeze response might have prevented someone from running away from a dog that was about to bite them. With SP, this memory could be slowed down and the therapist helps the individual mindfully explore their bodily responses to that experience as they recall it; often there are actions that the body wants to take such as pushing away or fleeing from harm that help the nervous system re-regulate and understand the event is now over and the individual is safe.

Sensorimotor Psychotherapy is substantiated by neuroscience and peer-reviewed research and has been found to be an effective treatment for survivors of traumatic or upsetting events, those with attachment or childhood traumas, as well as individuals with anxiety or physical health symptoms that cannot be medically explained.

SP can be a powerful way of integrating or strengthening the connection between the mind, body, and automatic or reflexive actions in order to increase a sense of peace, heal from trauma, or gain relief from physical symptoms.

If you are interested in beginning or learning more about Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, connect with me at kimberly@intuitivecounselingdenver.com.

Learn More About Kim

My name is Kimberly Polsen and I am thrilled to announce the opening of my new practice, Intuitive Wellness Counseling. I truly believe in, respect, and honor the power of the therapeutic relationship and my hope is to share a bit about myself in order to create safety and model the bravery and transparency that I aim to bring out in my work with clients. Through this blog, I intend to share wisdom, hope, humor, and information as I strive to continue learning, growing, and witnessing healing in myself and others. 

I arrived at becoming a counselor in a roundabout way and it took me some time to trust in and follow my true path. I have learned about myself that I tend to stay busy and have worked since my teenage years, holding positions including a barista, legal assistant, raw vegan chef, nanny - and many others in between. I have always found empathy to come naturally and known that I was a “helper” though it took time and connecting to myself to discover the route that helping would take. I initially planned to become an elementary school teacher but halfway through my college experience, I knew that psychology classes were where my passion lied and I took a leap of faith and transferred to an out-of-state school to pursue a psychology degree.

However, an intense and challenging internship my senior year caused me to re-think my plans to become a therapist as I was unfamiliar with how to work with those who were suffering while remaining connected to myself and the present moment. During this time, I struggled with anxiety, uncertainty, and self-doubt and focused on continuing to stay busy rather than trusting in my instincts and following my path. Due to my personal history, I also thought that helping others meant overextending and stepping outside of myself; this was a lesson that took many years to come to fruition but it would be a powerful turning point for me.

After graduation, I knew that I still wanted to help others heal though, again, was uncertain about how. I found that focusing on a holistic and healthy lifestyle was one way to “help” and I spent a few years in the culinary world. While I felt rewarded by the improvements I saw in my customers who struggled with allergies, food restrictions, diabetes, and disease, at the end of the day when I had space to slow down, I knew something still didn’t feel quite right. Ultimately, it was a series of problems at the business I was working at and continuous roadblocks that helped me see that my energy and enthusiasm had dimmed and when I was truly present and connected to myself, something was telling me that this route was not working out. Through these experiences, I tested my limits, patience, and creativity and after a few years of soul-searching in my twenties, knew that counseling had called me back. In retrospect, I now understand that I was continuing to stay busy and disconnected from my own intuitive knowing of my true path.   

Throughout my training in graduate school, internship, and initial job at a counseling center in Chicago, I grappled with balancing my sensitive and empathic nature with some of the hardships of daily life, oppression, trauma, and illness that I witnessed. Through these experiences, I worked to steadily become more connected to my own emotional experience and gained coping skills that helped me to be present with others and myself in order to anchor to a steadiness that I struggled to find in college and early career choices. One significant turning point was attending the Sensorimotor Psychotherapy training; I will be forever grateful for the impact that this training has had on my own connection to myself, my body, and my experience as well as the transformative tools that it taught me to wield in my work with clients. 

Through these experiences, I have continued to be passionate about working with those who have experienced and are working to overcome low self-confidence, anxiety, and trauma. I feel honored to be a witness to healing every day and firmly believe in the resiliency of the human spirit. I hope that the work that I have done to connect to my emotions and body while honoring my natural sensitivity and empathy and the balance that I continue to find in being genuine, kind, and brave will guide me in my work with clients. As someone who has experienced anxiety, overwork, perfectionism, and overwhelm at times, I can empathize with many of the difficulties that challenge my clients including struggling with connecting to a genuine sense of self, battling anxiety and self-doubt, and grappling with taking up space and using your voice.I feel passionate about supporting others in healing from childhood wounds, connecting to emotions and experience, and overcoming trauma. I look forward to and am exceedingly grateful to be on this journey.